Monthly Archives: July 2008

I only call you lucky charm because you’re useless and cheap

A list of useful information (as designated by me):

  • If you can see the black cocker spaniel’s butt, she’s not finished
  • If that same cocker spaniel leaves your sight, follow her
  • Eat lunch off-site on bring your offspring to work day (thanks Sara)
  • As long as you get the appointment, it does not matter that the hair dresser calls you Becky
  • If you are going to attempt to punch your way out of the cat flap, be extra careful you don’t get your paw stuck.

 

Through the looking glass and out of the closet….

Small Door, Medium Dog
Small Door, Medium Dog

I recently relocated to Greeneville, Tennessee to live with my boyfriend.  He installed a cat door to bridge the garage and the house, since we put the cat food and litter box in the garage.  It took one of the cats (Fred) 3 days to dare to attempt the door, and that was only with someone holding it open for her. Piper, on the other hand, took almost a week to muster up the courage to poke his head through. As you can see, it took the cocker spaniel about 10 seconds to try to get through the door. Unfortunately for her, she does not fit through the door. Thus, the litter box cafe is now offically closed.

Bring your offspring to work day

I work for a very large company, so the annual ‘bring your kid to work day’ is a pretty big ordeal. In the olden timey days folks just brought the day care convicts in and pushed them up to a desk.  The place sounded like a Wal-Mart with someone crying every 3 minutes. I had to navigate little feet sticking out from under desks to make it to the cafeteria. I was pretty sure I had died and gone to some sort of snotty nosed hell.

After the 5th fire alarm incident, the company decided to set some rules and create a little structure around the event.  While I appreciate that I no longer have to tread the gauntlet to get to the bathroom, I wonder if the activities scheduled for the tots are really giving the right impression. There will be finger painting, snacks, movie time, and a visit from the Hands On Museum and Bay’s Mountain.  Is this really what we want them to think work is like? Yeah, Mom finger paints in the morning, followed by snacks, movie time, lunch and finishes the day off petting a raccoon?  I think we should make them sort through lines of code in 6 point type on green bar paper. This should show them what the real world is like, not be like a day at summer camp.  But, of course, they didn’t ask me.

 

Some of My Favorite things (today, anyway)

Some of my favorite things (in no particular order)

  • Hanging out with Jon
  • The sound of my dog at the water dish
  • Microwaving chocolate marshmallows before consuming their gooey chocolatey goodness
  • Listening to the rain on my new metal roof
  • Comfortable places to catch a nap
  • Hanging out with Elphaba
  • Using my mp3 player to ignore the people around me
  • The smell of dog feet (they smell like corn chips)
  • Watching “Big Bangy Theory” on Monday nights

Cats like to barf on clean carpet and other astute observations

Yep, cats like to yak on your clean carpet. In fact, I have it on very good authority that they seek out clean carpet, clean comforters and/or new pieces of furniture on which to spew. Put a new comforter on the bed and a grand plot begins to hatch in your cat’s walnut sized brain to calculate the precise angle and trajectory with which to gain the maximum amount of gook.  They get bonus points if you don’t discover the offense until it is time to go to bed forcing you to spend the night in a chilly comforter-less bed with a slightly damp mattress (from the cleaning). If there are multiple cats in the house, it becomes even more challenging as they each have to perform a feat of strength to see who gets the privilege of tossing the first metaphorical cookie. If there is a canine in the home, the canine has the option of consuming product provided they leave enough of the liquid to soak through.

Sears sucks, out loud.

The Jet Puffed Chocolate Marshmallows Rock!

Sushi, Vacuum Cleaners and the Dreaded Cat Room

Sushi Bar at Stir FryDo I have the greatest boyfriend or what?  Not only did he make this killer logo for my site, he fixed my vacuum cleaner (which involved removing massive quantities of cat hair and litter from it) AND he totally cleaned out the cat room (including shampooing the carpet) all while I was at work.  Then, later that night he took me out for my first sushi–which was not that bad. I actually liked the Philadelphia roll that I ordered but didn’t care too much for the Hawiian roll or the seaweed salad.  It’s a texture thing for me.

We are all here because we are not all here

I saw that statement on a calendar tacked to the carpeted wall of someone’s cubicle at work.  It reminded me of the old “you don’t have to be crazy to work here, but it helps,” sign that you see on the walls of tiny offices.  It spurred a series of thoughts.  I am about to FINALLY finish my first undergraduate degree. I feel like something should happen, like I should run right out and find a great new job. Most of my classmates are young enough that they don’t have their “real” job yet.  Me, I’ve been banging away at the same keyboard for over 11 years. I have great medical, 4 weeks vacation and a 401K.   Wow, how old did that make me sound? 

Back to the original thought, if you compare your job to being crazy are you really happy in your job?  What are your options if you are really settled? You could be like my new hero, Jonathan Coulton.  He left his programming job to become a music making Internet phenom.  Check him out at www.jonathancoulton.com.  Buy some of his music.